Wednesday, September 09, 2015

SUSAN SARANDON’S PREDICTION OF A GENTLER WORLD

The anti-death penalty crusading actress predicts that when pot becomes legal we will have a much gentler world

Susan Sarandon, who won the Academy Award for her role in Dead Man Walking, is also recognized as a fervent supporter of liberal causes. She has been a longtime crusader in the campaign to abolish the death penalty. Sarandon is also an admitted user of marijuana, magic mushrooms and other psychedelic drugs derived from plants.

Susan Sarandon loves the Burning Man, an annual event held in Nevada’s Black Rock desert that was attended this year by 70,000 nutters and stoners. On Saturday, Sarandon dressed in a mini-skirted bridal gown, disposed her share of Timothy Leary’s ashes in a makeshift church at Burning Man. Leary, the LSD guru, died in 1996 and was cremated with his ashes divvied up among a few close friends, including Sarandon. Most of Leary’s ashes were sent into outer space in 1997.

According to USA Today, Sarandon led a funeral procession of several thousand idiots high on LSD. She said, “I think he’d [Leary] be so happy. I think he would have loved the chaos. He would have loved it. And all these people honoring him with LSD.”

That’s right folks … Susan Sarandon, the Academy Award winning actress and anti-death penalty crusader, loved and honored the man who turned a whole generation of Americans into a bunch of brain addled illegal drug users.

All the nonsense surrounding the disposal of Leary’s ashes reminds me of an interview Sarandon gave the Daily Beast last year. Here is one statement Sarandon made:

“It [marijuana] will be legal everywhere, and that will cause a very interesting tipping point. Certainly, if more people were smoking instead of drinking, people don’t get mean on weed, don’t beat up their wives on weed, and don’t drive crazy on weed. They just get hungry, don’t go out of the house, or laugh a lot. I think it would make for a much more gentle world.”

Now why haven’t President Obama, Vladimir Putin, the Iranian Mullahs, Kim Jong Un, Xi Jinping, Benjamin Netanyahu, Mahmoud Abbas, and other feuding leaders thought of that? Instead of a world beset with wars, threats of war and terrorism, we would have a much gentler world if everyone were to get stoned on pot.

A gentler world

Instead of glaring at each other across the negotiating table, Secretary Kerry’s delegation and the Iranians would have been laughing it up.

Instead of waging war and beheadings, members of ISIS would be laying down their AK-47s and swords and laughing while waving their black flags.

Instead of threatening each other with war, the South Koreans and North Koreans would be laughing at Panmunjon. Kim Jong Un would dismantle his nuclear arsenal and laugh while doing so. The U.S. and North Korea would sign a treaty of friendship. Former NBA star Dennis Rodman would become America’s ambassador to N. Korea. If their leaders smoked enough pot, the north and south would unify and Korea would again be one country

Instead of killing each other, the Israelis and Palestinians would join together in a laugh fest. Hamas and Hezbollah would lay down their arms and Israel would dismantle its nuclear weapons. Holy shit, if they would just smoke pot, that would solve the whole fucking Middle East crisis.

A gentler America

Meanwhile at home, instead of killing each other, rival gangbangers in South Los Angeles, the South Bronx, Chicago's Southside and other notorious gang-infested American neighborhoods would be laughing together. Instead of shouting obscenities at each other, members of Black Lives Matter and white cops would laugh and hug each other.

Even the destitute poor would be laughing while hungry. Why, we could slash welfare funds drastically, and the recipients would still be left laughing. No need for any more free school lunches … Instead you’ll hear those hungry kids laughing.

On the other hand, instead of slashing spending, the government can tax the shit out of everyone because the taxpayers would all be laughing.

There would be no more bickering and fighting between Democrats and Republicans in Congress. Instead they would join together to form a unity party, the Stoner Party. Candidates for public office would be urging the voters to elect their opponents.

With everyone laughing, prisons would be less dangerous. Correctional officers and inmates will join hands and sing Kumbaya together. And with everyone laughing, there will be fewer arrests and convictions, which will solve the problem of prison overcrowding. With everyone on pot, it wouldn’t be too long before half the country’s prisons could be closed down.

With everyone stoned, there would be few traffic citations issued. A state trooper would just laugh when passed up by a laughing driver speeding at 100 mph. And in the rare instance where the trooper and driver wound up in court, they and the judge would laugh so hard that the judge would sentence the driver, the trooper and himself to jail for disturbing the peace.

Instead of demanding he be put to death, families of murder victims would be laughing if the killer were to receive a light sentence.

And for you cops out there,, whenever you catch up to an armed suspect, instead of shooting at each other, the two of you would laugh and stop off for a beer on the way to the pokey. Why with everyone stoned and laughing, there’d be no need for cops to be armed anymore.

What a novel idea. Just get everyone stoned and we would all be living in a much gentler world. So I say, fuck Hillary Clinton, Bernie Sanders, Donald Trump, Ben Carson and all the other presidential candidates. Susan Sarandon for President!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

She's crazy as a shit house mouse!

bob walsh said...

Typical stoner logic.