Ted Nugent, that warrior for Second Amendment rights, used some really shitty means to keep from being a warrior in the Vietnam War.
TED NUGENT, WHO SHIT HIS PANTS TO AVOID VIETNAM, BLAMES MILITARY SUICIDES ON CONSTITUTIONAL VIOLATION
By Casey Michel
Houston Press Hair Balls
May 2, 2013
For whatever reason, there are those among us who feel Ted Nugent is a cogent voice for Second Amendment rights. There are people who feel he's doing a service to those seeking to maintain their right to bear arms every time he flaps his soul patch. There are those that respect him.
Hopefully, after his most recent outburst on conspiracy-monger Alex Jones's radio show, a few remaining supporters will fall off The Nuge's bandwagon. Because, for whatever reason, Nugent thought it worth both his and our time to detail the fact that the US is experiencing a record rate of military suicides not because of any form of physical or mental trauma piled through neoconservative foreign policy, but, rather, because Obama is trampling their constitutional rights. These men and women who opted to fight these two heinous wars are now taking their own lives with such rapidity, according to Nugent, not because of any PTSD, but because they might have to one day stand for a five-minute background check before they purchase a trigger-lock-less assault rifle.
Take it away, chump:
__And I'm sure the leftist blogs are going to attack me, misquote me, but I'll tell you why more and more warrior heroes of the military are killing themselves: Because they are in absolute frustration and heartbreak that their boss, their Commander-In-Chief violates the Constitution that he has made an oath to while their hero warrior blood brothers are being blown to smithereens and blown up while executing their oath to the same Constitution that the president, the vice president, and the attorney general violate.
Much like Louie Gohmert aside him, Nugent doesn't feel the need to offer anything approaching proof. Like his supporters -- like those listening in on Jones's show, likely -- facts and citations are for the milquetoast among us. Gut sentiments and pure belief are the only road the ride. Anything, at any point, to score a political point -- even if it involves military suicides.
And just so we're clear: This is the same musician who claims to have dodged Vietnam by shitting in his pants for days on end. This is the same man who'd rather piss himself silly than join the "warriors" he now claims to "support."
See you at the NRA Convention this weekend, Nuge. Can't wait to hear more of your theories, and to see if you're still shitting yourself as much as you ever were.
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