APPALACHIAN TRAIL RUNS ALL THE WAY TO ARGENTINA

As the saying goes, you can learn something new every day. I’ve always thought the Appalachian Trail runs from Maine to Georgia but I’ve just learned that it runs all the way down to Argentina.

When Gov. Mark Sanford of South Caroline mysteriously disappeared, his staff told us that he went away to spend some time in solitude by hiking on the Appalachian Trail. Upon his return, he confessed that he had gone all the way down to Argentina to spend five days in Buenos Aires doing the tango between the sheets with the extramarital love of his life.

Of course, by now everyone knows the story of the good governor’s great "hike." He left his SUV, with his camping gear inside, at the Columbia airport and flew off to Buenos Aires to be with his Argentine lover, a beautiful woman he met eight years ago at a dance hall in Uruguay while on a business trip to South America. He might have gotten away with his hiking ruse had it not been that a reporter, who happened to be at the Atlanta airport, recognized the governor upon his return to the United States. That let the cat out of the bag.

Sanford was a rising star in the Republican Party who has often been mentioned as a possible presidential candidate. Alas, now poor old Mark’s star has dimmed. Presidential ambitions aside, he may also see his hold on the governor’s office slip away. Another Republican bible thumping, family values office holder appears to be biting the dust.

What in the world would lead a prominent public official to risk his marriage and his political career for a "piece of ass?" Among a long list of others, you might want to ask Eliot Spitzer, New York’s former Democratic governor and presidential hopeful, who resigned from office in disgrace after it came to light that he had been dilly-dallying around with high-priced prostitutes.

Why would a married governor fall in love with an Argentine woman from Buenos Aires? I think I know why. I’ve been to Brazil and Peru four times, to Argentina and Venezuela three times, and once to Columbia and Ecuador. In each and every one of those South American countries I’ve seen hundreds of drop-dead gorgeous "hotties" who would have melted butter in a freezer. Those women, usually of European extraction, are not only eye-popping beautiful, but unlike American women, they have not been spoiled.

I wish I could show you some snapshots of the many stunningly beautiful women I saw during my travels in South America, but I was unable to take their pictures when those beauties caught my eye. However, I will show you some snapshots that I took of three ordinary looking babes in Brazil. Now that you've seen these pictures, I’ll let you imagine what an easy-to-fall-for drop-dead gorgeous South American "hottie" would look like.


So now you know what happened to Gov. Sanford. He met a beautiful Argentine woman in Uruguay, fell in love with her, couldn’t resist disappearing from sight for some sack time in Buenos Aires with his new found love, got caught as he returned, and lost all hope for any shot at the presidency. And that is also how I learned the Appalachian Trail runs all the way from Maine down to Argentina.