Saturday, November 13, 2010


Sportscasters’ terminology causes couch jocks to fantasize. That explains why those guys at the Connelly family Thanksgiving wanted to stay after the meal to watch the games.
By Jeff Balke
Houston Press Hair Balls
November 12, 2010
A lot of these slang terms also sound unintentionally dirty and we have taken notice. It's difficult to make it through a Sunday afternoon without chuckling just a little at the announcers during an NFL game as they discuss balls, holes and penetration. We realize not all of you are hip to the lingo of sports, so we've prepared this little list of ten filthy-sounding sports terms to help you stay informed.
10. Penetrate deep into the backfield

When a defensive player in football does this, it often results in a loss of yardage for the offense. In sex, this is really more win-win.
9. Stuff it in the hole

In basketball, this kind of dunk can be violent and there is often celebrating afterward. In sex, well, same thing.
8. High and tight

A pitcher can use this tactic to get the ball up in the strike zone and close to the batter. If he loses control of the pitch, it could end up giving the batter some "chin music." High and tight can also lead to chin music in sex if you aren't careful or are into that sort of thing, you filthy little pervert.
7. Going back door

This is praised in basketball as a good way to score. In sex, it requires the right combination of partner and alcohol or you could get "rejected" as you try to "take it to the hole."
6. Hit it in the rough

This is either a description of a golfer hitting the ball into the long grass off the fairway or a `70's porn title.
5. Double team

This is a common defensive tactic used against particularly good players. To see examples of this in sex, you can to watch late night movies on Cinemax or just close your eyes and dare to dream.
4. Lay the wood

In football and in sex, this is generally a good thing.
3. Facial

When you dunk a basketball in the face of a defender, it can be humiliating for the defender. There have even been posters made of facials. Sexually speaking, humiliating posters of this sort of thing are not normally found outside San Francisco sex shops or Google images with "safe search" turned off.
2. Give the guy a blow

While this phrase may be slang for giving a player a rest, if players really did get a "blow" when they came out of the game, we're pretty sure guys would be winded more often.
1. Come inside
Throwing a ball inside on a batter is considered a risky maneuver because if the ball hits the player, there could be consequences later. Coming inside during sex is pretty much the same thing. It's why both the batter and the sex partner should consider wearing protection.

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