FIRST HEAD ROLLS

by Bob Walsh

An unnamed student at Stanford University has been handed her ass and shown the door as a result of "resume enhancement" on her application. She apparently fabricated her credentials as a competition sailor and her admission was followed by a donation of $500,000 to the sailing club there.

Her application has been "rescinded" and her credits have been voided.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Actually the student got fucked because she had absolutely no knowledge of what her mother did.