What deadly weapon is used against cops more than any other weapon? Is it guns? Knives? Clubs, tire irons, crow bars or other blunt instruments? If you read the newspapers, listen to radio news reports or watch the news on TV, you would have to conclude it was none of those – you would have to think it was automobiles. Not a week goes by without an officer somewhere in this country shooting at a subject trying to run him down with a car. And every one of those officers, no matter where, go by the name of Stu Pido.
Now there are occasions when a crook will deliberately try to run down an officer, but such cases are actually far and few between. In almost every instance, instead of taking a deliberate run at a cop, the driver was just trying to get away when Officer Pido jumped in front of the car trying to get the fleeing driver to stop. As the cop jumps aside he instinctively shoots at the guy that was trying to ‘run him down.’ The problem with Stu is that he doesn’t have enough sense to realize that jumping in front of a moving car is a really bad idea.
On Monday, Humble (a town just north of Houston) officer Stu Pido got out of the way of a stolen truck occupied by two men that officers said was backing at them as they tried to get away after burglarizing several cars at a Sears parking lot. Stu used his gun to smash in the window of the truck and – a big oops – the weapon accidentally discharged, killing one of the burglars. Imagine that – using his personal gun as a club, a gun that must have cost him anywhere between 500 and 900 bucks.
Years ago Stu, a California cop, did one even better than jumping in front of a car. He jumped in front of a moving train and tried to wave it to a stop. Good old Stu was able to jump aside but his patrol car did not fare as well. Stu had parked it across the railroad tracks with its emergency lights flashing when he got out to flag down the train. What was left of the patrol car, and there wasn’t that much left, ended up a half mile down the tracks.
On another occasion Stu, a Houston cop, struck a youth over the head with his gun after a car chase ended and –another big oops – the weapon discharged blowing half the young man’s head away. Stu, who did not intend to kill the youth, was pissed off because the victim and his girlfriend, who had been spotted stealing a toolbox, had the audacity to flee in his truck with over a dozen police cars in pursuit.
And now we have Stu Pido, a Los Angeles school district cop, who accidentally shot himself in the chest while ‘mishandling’ his gun. He was arrested after it was determined he fabricated a story that he had been shot by a burglary suspect as he was patrolling a street near a school. His lies caused nine schools to be locked down and seven square miles of residential neighborhoods to be blocked off while more than 350 officers from five agencies searched for the ‘gunman.’
All these cops named Stu Pido seem to think that by jumping in front of a moving vehicle driven by some jerk trying to flee, they can get it to stop. Other Stus apparently don’t know that a gun that was meant to shoot can go off accidentally when used as a club to break a window or to strum some jerk’s head. And then you have all those Stus who keep using their guns as sex toys, getting their rocks off fondling them all the time.
No comments:
Post a Comment