Friday, June 10, 2016

ASTRONAUT’S ASS IN DEEP SHIT

By Bob Walsh

James Halsell Jr, 59, of Huntsville, Alabama, used to be a VIP. He was a five-time space shuttle commander. He is now a suspect in the DUI death of two little girls.

According to the state police Halsell was heavily intoxicated when he ploughed into a car that was carrying Nimoi James, 11, and Jayla Parler, 13 at about 0300 hours on Monday morning. The girls were ejected from the car. In the immediate aftermath of the wreck Halsell apparently attempted to steal the pick-up truck of a Good Samaritan who stopped at the scene of the wreck, presumably in order to flee the scene. He claims no recollection of the wreck and for that matter claims to not remember leaving the hotel.

When the cops searched the retired Colonel’s hotel room they found an empty bottle of wine and an empty bottle of sleeping pills. Halsell copped to having three glasses of wine.

Halsell is now free on $150,000 bond. He spent over 1200 hours in space. I suspect he will spend much more than that as a guest of the people of Alabama unless he has a lot of luck and a very good lawyer. Even if that is successful he will probably live out the rest of his life living in the back seat of a 1980 Pinto station wagon after the civil suit is done. Fuck him, he’s got nothing coming.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Nope. If he was taking Ambien for sleep disorders, I'll bet he gets off with a slap on the wrist. Several prior accounts of sleep walking/driving have been documented with this med.