The Unconventional Gazette
July 10, 2014
A man’s last name stays put.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
Men can never be pregnant.
Men do not have periods.
Men can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
Men can wear no shirt to a water park.
Auto shop mechanics tell men the truth.
Men can pee anywhere.
Men never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
Men don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress: $5,000. Tux rental: $100.
People never stare at a man’s chest when they're talking to him.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle a man’s feet.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
Men know stuff about tanks, guns, tools, football and NASCAR.
Men can read Playboy, Penthouse and Hustler magazines.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
Men can open all their own jars.
If someone forgets to invite a man to a party, he or she can still be his friend.
Men’s underwear are $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
Everything on a man’s face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, even decades.
Men only have to shave their faces and necks.
Men can play with toys no matter how old they are.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons.
Men can wear shorts no matter how their legs look.
Men can 'do' their nails with a pocket knife.
Men have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
Men can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
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