'BUZZARD' FALLS FROM NEST, PUT IN CAGE

JOHNNY LEE WALLEY, JR.: SICS HIS PIT BULL ON COPS, HIDES IN CEILING (UNTIL HE FALLS)
By Craig Malisow

Houston Press Hair Balls
May 13, 2010

For three days this week, the man known as "Buzzard" had eluded Montgomery County deputies who were trying to track him down after he jumped bail on a pit bull-related arrest. In that November incident, which seems perfectly in keeping with a dude who calls himself -- or is referred to by others as -- "Buzzard," Johnny Lee Walley Jr. sicced his pit bull on Precinct 4 deputies who were conducting a home search.

According to The Police News, "the dog lunged at Chief Deputy Barry Welch, who had to use deadly force to stop the attack."

Walley was ultimately charged with two counts of aggravated assault on a public servant, possession of meth, and "hindering apprehension or prosecution of a known felon." After he was released on bond, he was a no-show on his court date. Thus began the manhunt.

According to The Police News, "the search for Walley included multiple locations," none of which yielded the elusive Buzzard, but which apparently turned up a plethora of his (allegedly) less-than-respectable acquaintances; deputies wound up arresting nine people in their hunt.

When deputies followed up yet another tip at yet another home, it looked like it was going to be another dead end. They walked from room to room, striking out each time. Then came the creaking sound in the master bedroom, followed by the sound of the Buzzard falling from the heavens....or, more specifically, the attic, where he had been hiding. According to The Police News, "'Buzzard' was nestled in some insulation in the attic. He remained still, but the sheetrock beneath him did not, giving way and dropping Walley through the ceiling into the master bedroom, where he was busted and cuffed and returned to the Montgomery County Jail, charged with bond forfeiture."

This unlikely turn of events gave Constable Rowdy Hayden the chance to give his money-quote: "The Buzzard fell from his nest, and we put him [in] a cage."

We just wonder exactly how long ol’ Buzzard was hiding out in the attic. Was he there all three days? Either way, he's probably telling himself he'll find a foolproof hiding spot next time. Like under the bed.