Saturday, June 29, 2019

TIME OUT FOR A LITTLE HUMOR

Here are a couple of jokes that should make you laugh out loud.

DID SHE JUMP?

Yesterday, a group of hell's angels, South Carolina bikers were riding east on Rt 378 when they saw a girl about to jump off the Pee Dee River Bridge.

So they stopped. Bubba G, their leader, a big burly man, gets off his Harley, walks through a group of gawkers, past the state trooper who was trying to talk her down off the railing, and says, "Hey baby whatcha doin' up there on that railin'?"

She says tearfully, "I'm going to commit suicide!!"

Why don't you give ol' Bubba G here your best last kiss?

So, with no hesitation at all, she leaned back over the railing and did just that. It was a long, deep, lingering kiss followed immediately by another even better one.

After they breathlessly finished, Bubba G gets a big thumbs-up approval from his biker-buddies, the onlookers, and even the state trooper, and then says, "Wow! That was the best kiss I have ever had! That's a real talent you're wasting there, sugar shorts. You could be famous if you rode with me. Why are you committing suicide?"

"My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl."

It’s unclear if he jumped or was pushed.
__________

MY WIFE SAID I MIGHT HAVE GOTTEN DISABILITY TOO

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.

She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability too.'

1 comment:

Trey Rusk said...

Funny!