Monday, August 22, 2016

LITERARY BARRISTER SAVES CLIENT’S BUTT

By Bob Walsh

Cathy McCulloch is a barrister in the U.K. She recently defended a man against charges that he repeated engaged in acts of forcible incest against his own daughter. According to Ms. McCulloch, his only real defense was his assertion that he didn’t do it.

The daughter described in great detail the things her father forced her to do. It struck the barrister as odd, as much of the wording seemed far too “old” for the girl. And, the day before the trial, the father mentioned that the girl’s favorite novel was the S&M bestseller, 50 SHADES OF GRAY.

The barrister got a brief continuance and compared the daughter’s testimony to the police with the text of the book. The similarities were remarkable.

Three days into the trial the “victim” took the stand and stated, among other things,that she was annoyed with daddy for “running her life” because he was quite strict with her. The barrister then went over her testimony phrase by phrase with the “victim” and compared it to the book. The daughter folded like a cheap lawn chair,confessing she made the whole thing up to get daddy dearest into trouble.

The judge ordered the jury to bring in a jury of acquittal. It is unknown if the cops will make a charge against the girl, whose name and age are not mentioned in the news pieces. (The Limies are often very stuffy about what they call Wasting Police Time, which is a criminal offense.)

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