Sunday, June 04, 2017


by Bob Walsh

The latest pronouncement from the People's Republic of Bezerkley is that plastic straws are evil. They are non-biodegradable and therefore should be banned from the surface of the planet, kind of like cow farts. Never mind the fact that paper (biodegradable) straws cost literally 8-10 times more than plastic and that some things, like milk shakes, don't do well with paper straws.

The city council is studying the matter and could vote on it next year. The liberal fascists in the city assert (probably accurately) that a significant number of plastic straws find themselves into waterways where they are ugly and cause problems, like ugliness. Bezerkeley city councilwoman, Ms. Hahn, asserts that "I'm really confident people will learn how to drink again without straws."

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

They should ban cars too. They are made of plastic materials and when involved in a collision they litter the highways with non-biodegradable plastic.