Tuesday, March 29, 2011

HE WONT BE KISSING ANYONE FOR A WHILE

This is what’s likely to happen when one watches too many Ninja movies:

Hi-ya! Swoosh! Splat!

ROBERT SALYER: ATTACKS STEPDAUGHTER’S BOYFRIEND WITH SAMURAI SWORD
By John Nova Lomax

Houston Press Hairballs
March 28, 2011

There are no tears in Robert Salyer's dojo. Neither does this 40-year-old Corpus Christi ninja tolerate domestic disturbances involving his stepdaughter and her boyfriend.

Police there say that Salyer brought to a close a squabble between the two lovebirds -- both of whom live in the Nueces County home with Salyer -- by slicing off a piece of the 25-year-old boyfriend's lip with a samurai sword.

Police arrived last Thursday to find Salyer and the blood-covered boyfriend shouting in the front yard. The younger man told police that he had been arguing with his girlfriend in their bedroom when Salyer asked him to leave.

According to the Corpus Christi Caller-Times, when the boyfriend refused, Salyer kicked in the door, and hi-ya!, cold Tamahagane steel flashed through the warm Coastal Bend night. To perdition went some of the lip that had been shattering the peace of Robert Salyer's nocturnal warrior meditations.

Other versions have it that the young man did leave the premises and then returned and kicked in the door, thus precipitating the kitana lip-ectomy. Which version is true and correct would seem to be key in deciding if Salyer can invoke the dojo doctrine. After all, a ninja's home is his castle same as anybody else.

At any rate, Salyer-san was charged at the scene with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon. The boyfriend refused treatment at the scene and was cut loose. Salyer has a six-year-old conviction for domestic violence for which he served 30 days in Nueces County Jail, according to online records.

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