THE PAPAL PHYSICIAN FEARED POPE FRANCIS WAS ABOUT TO HAVE A HEART ATTACK

Mighty Notre Dam trounces Northern Illinois ... Oops, that should read Northern Illinois defeats Notre Dame 16-14 

 

By Howie Katz

 

 

Northern Illinois quarterback Ethan Hampton celebrates with fans after his team beat No. 5 Notre Dame on Saturday in South Bend, Indiana

 

Northern Illinois University? I never heard of it, that is until Saturday.

Mighty Notre Dame was expected to trounce the university that no one outside of Illinois even knew it existed. But Northern Illinois fought off Notre Dame and won 16-14. And to rub salt into the wound, they did it on Notre Dame's home turf in South Bend, Indiana.

Catholics all over the world were left in shock. In the final moments of the game, a furious Pope kept pounding his fists on a table while shouting obscenities at the TV. The papal physician feared Pope Francis was about to have a heart attack.

On the other hand, Baptists were overjoyed over Notre Dame's loss. Many of them celebrated with the consumption of alcohol, a sin in the Baptist faith.